I am shy.

I keep telling people I am shy but no one believes me.

So I did a personality test (okay, as a part of my module assignment) and the results were that I am low in extraversion and even lower in openness to experience. The comments were super hurtful lah, it says Low in Openness to Experience means I am simple and shallow. WHERE GOT WHERE GOT. I hardly talk about getting 20,000 readers lor.

Upon reflection, I realised this is very true. When I was choosing JCs, I pretended to consider other JCs but deep in my heart I knew where I was going to choose. When I keep saying I wanna go for exchange, I know I wouldn't dare to step out of my comfort zone and do it. And I can already see my path in the next 10 years, what I am going to do with my life, what kind of jobs I am going to do etc. My life is as predictable as fortune telling. (HAHAHAHA, I love my own similes!)

Worse is, I find nothing wrong with it. I once told a friend that I need a lot a lot a lot of time before I can trust enough to share. A lot a lot of time refers to both qualitative and quantitative. I don't know what made me like that too, very scary!

You think know where you stand, but maybe you are standing further away than you think.