As 2016 draws to an end, I guess we should do an obligatory end of the year post.
List for the many things I am grateful for:
1. (Rather) Good health, for myself and for family
2. Being introduced to my current job, and not screwing up anything major thus far
3. Having run my first 10k, though I had to walk with a limp for a few days after that
4. The chance, the company, and the ability to visit Japan like a leech, and getting to eat so so so so so many nice things (screams tuna sushiiiii)
5. Taiwan, whereby I got to buy lots and lots of fls and experience transport from a now defunct airline
6. And the recent Malacca, which was eat sleep eat eat eat sleep - sinful and blessed
7. Nice people around me. They say you are the average of 5 people you spend the most time with but I don't think I am as nice as you all. Thank you for lending a helping hand, for showing concern, for going on theme park rides with me, for encouraging me to share what is on my mind because I suck at expressing myself, for knowing what I will say next, for playing the lame games I design, for giving me the parts of the fish without bones, for helping me peel crab, for having my diet in mind when we meet up, for encouraging me when I dont feel like jogging, for treating me to food, and for putting up with me for another year.
Tuesday, December 27, 2016
Thursday, December 15, 2016
GP
I have seen this GP of mine for 10 years. Never was any consultation more than 10mins long.
Today I went to him for a problem and requested for help. He expressed that he is unable to take sides but would provide an opinion when asked.
What he did do for me in a 20min consultation is to help me put things into perspective. To help manage expectations and yet give his two cents worth on the harsh reality of life from his years of practice. And as a rash(er) young adult who hasn't had to see many of the uglier things around, it did help me understand and manage my emotions.
In the midst of singling out unfair things that happen to us, sometimes we forget that there are more important things that we have that no one can take away. It also reminded me of something I was told a long time ago - 人生还有很多亏等你去吃.
So I guess instead of focusing on giving my best and being fixated on the results which are, more often that not, disappointing I should take things in stride.
Best of all, the 20min lesson was free.
Today I went to him for a problem and requested for help. He expressed that he is unable to take sides but would provide an opinion when asked.
What he did do for me in a 20min consultation is to help me put things into perspective. To help manage expectations and yet give his two cents worth on the harsh reality of life from his years of practice. And as a rash(er) young adult who hasn't had to see many of the uglier things around, it did help me understand and manage my emotions.
In the midst of singling out unfair things that happen to us, sometimes we forget that there are more important things that we have that no one can take away. It also reminded me of something I was told a long time ago - 人生还有很多亏等你去吃.
So I guess instead of focusing on giving my best and being fixated on the results which are, more often that not, disappointing I should take things in stride.
Best of all, the 20min lesson was free.
Tuesday, December 13, 2016
My best.
I think lists help me sort out my life a lot. I make lists at work and cross out whatever I have done. I also make lists when there are many things on my mind and I don't know where to start.
1. Will give my best: Grateful for the opportunity to go overseas for work and learn so much. I am really thankful for all that has been given to me at work, and I want to pick up all the skills and gain all the knowledge that I can to do my best.
2. Have given my best: Glad that I finally got the much needed closure (for the lack of a better word). As with all things, I gave it my best. And perhaps the stars just wouldn't align for me but it's fine I guess. In the greater scheme of things, this wouldn't matter.
3. Going to give my best: Received some news and got a rude shock, then denial, then how do I solve this, then what is the worst that can happen, and finally I'm going to fight this. It would be tiring, but I'm gonna give it my best.
I can do this.
1. Will give my best: Grateful for the opportunity to go overseas for work and learn so much. I am really thankful for all that has been given to me at work, and I want to pick up all the skills and gain all the knowledge that I can to do my best.
2. Have given my best: Glad that I finally got the much needed closure (for the lack of a better word). As with all things, I gave it my best. And perhaps the stars just wouldn't align for me but it's fine I guess. In the greater scheme of things, this wouldn't matter.
3. Going to give my best: Received some news and got a rude shock, then denial, then how do I solve this, then what is the worst that can happen, and finally I'm going to fight this. It would be tiring, but I'm gonna give it my best.
I can do this.
Monday, November 14, 2016
Decisions
Good decisions I made today:
1. Woke up earlier than yesterday so my day was longer.
2. Cooked the chicken breast that I meant to cook last week to bring to work.
3. Started on the mini scrapbooking project.
4. Jogged a longer round in the evening.
5. Got to reading the 三国演义 I borrowed.
6. Downloaded the apps I've been wanting to try out (Shopback, sparkasia etc)
Bad decision I made today:
1. Iced hazelnut latte at 8.30pm
1. Woke up earlier than yesterday so my day was longer.
2. Cooked the chicken breast that I meant to cook last week to bring to work.
3. Started on the mini scrapbooking project.
4. Jogged a longer round in the evening.
5. Got to reading the 三国演义 I borrowed.
6. Downloaded the apps I've been wanting to try out (Shopback, sparkasia etc)
Bad decision I made today:
1. Iced hazelnut latte at 8.30pm
Friday, November 4, 2016
Writing
The reason why I keep this blog is because I want to remind myself of the importance of writing. These days there is so much information available for us to read that we get lazy to write. Writing helps me reflect on certain events, record this point in time, and gather my thoughts on where to go from here.
That day I alighted at the mrt station at my workplace and thought to myself that life is beautiful because I am awake at 9am and on my way to work, which means I am alive and I have a job. Coincidentally, it was payday.
That day I alighted at the mrt station at my workplace and thought to myself that life is beautiful because I am awake at 9am and on my way to work, which means I am alive and I have a job. Coincidentally, it was payday.
Sunday, October 30, 2016
Movie appreciation
成长，最残酷的部分就是，女孩永远比同年龄的男孩成熟，女孩的成熟，没有一个男孩招架得住。
--九把刀 《那些年，我们一起追的女孩》
Caught this on TV in Taiwan. We get different insights from the same movie at different time points of our lives, don't we.
Wednesday, August 24, 2016
Augustus update.
It's been some time.
Japan was good. So good that I don't wanna go back to work. Grateful that I got the opportunity to go on the trip and leech on, I mean, leverage on the expertise and hard work of fellow travel buddies. Icing on the cake was business class bday celebration. 🤘
Visited the doctor again for a review and would be put on medication. Nothing too serious/life-threatening. Just kind of sucky that I have to go through this cuz it is quite an annoyance but oh well.
Have been pokehunting but less conscientious with the game these days. Am more interested in the cute quirky ones (I still want a porygon!) than the supposedly powerful once (yes I didn't run for the snorlax when my sis spotted it in yishun). It's the experience of playing it with friends and getting to walk around singapore to places I would never have gone to (hello hougang blk 401) that appealed to me more.
Attended a bday party and was happy with what I saw. It's nice to see friends have people do nice things for them. I may not completely understand your struggles, I may constantly complain about wasting my youth spending time with you all, I may not always be there when you all need a listening ear. But I love and care about all of you a lot and it really makes me happy to see that you all are happier with than without.
Aiyoh, must be late night estrogen overload.
Japan was good. So good that I don't wanna go back to work. Grateful that I got the opportunity to go on the trip and leech on, I mean, leverage on the expertise and hard work of fellow travel buddies. Icing on the cake was business class bday celebration. 🤘
Visited the doctor again for a review and would be put on medication. Nothing too serious/life-threatening. Just kind of sucky that I have to go through this cuz it is quite an annoyance but oh well.
Have been pokehunting but less conscientious with the game these days. Am more interested in the cute quirky ones (I still want a porygon!) than the supposedly powerful once (yes I didn't run for the snorlax when my sis spotted it in yishun). It's the experience of playing it with friends and getting to walk around singapore to places I would never have gone to (hello hougang blk 401) that appealed to me more.
Attended a bday party and was happy with what I saw. It's nice to see friends have people do nice things for them. I may not completely understand your struggles, I may constantly complain about wasting my youth spending time with you all, I may not always be there when you all need a listening ear. But I love and care about all of you a lot and it really makes me happy to see that you all are happier with than without.
Aiyoh, must be late night estrogen overload.
Sunday, June 12, 2016
Hospital stay
A night's stay at the hospital taught me:
1. There may be times when I would be expected to make serious decisions.
2. The names that ran through my mind, friends or family, may not always be available to help.
3. When I was lying alone on the small operating table and asked to sign the consent form for operation, it was the ah-I-am-really-an-adult feeling.
4. And then I began to think, the few minutes before the procedure, what a sucky feeling this could potentially be when I am old and alone. With no dad or mum and no kids.
5. Despite having my leg stitched twice, I never got to see what goes on.
6. When I pack, food is one of the priorities.
7. So is moisturiser.
8. When I settle down and gather my emotions, I think I can take care of myself.
9. I try to prepare myself mentally for the worst.
10. Hospitalisation insurance saved my life.
11. Hospital food makes me excited. Like airplane food. And it is not because I took steroids.
12. Hospital food is really nice and healthy. Loved the detox and the -500g after staying a night. Even when I took carbs. Some carbs.
13. Drawing of my blood doesn't scare me. Should check if I am eligible for blood donations in future.
14. My doctor works really long hours.
15. Hospitals are not conducive for sleeping. You keep falling asleep but people keep waking you up. Nurses and doctors talk at night (which is necessary and understandable), people take my temperature and blood pressure, neighbour feels uncomfortable and tosses and turns (imagine how 4 bedded 6 bedded 8 bedded wards will be!), machines suddenly beep, aircon is too cold etc. Before you know it, it's time for breakfast.
16. Breakfast was poached eggs. Read the straits times while I ate.
17. It's nice to receive a get well soon basket from colleagues.
18. It's nice to have caring and enthu nurses.
19. Having visitors would disturb other patients in the ward, so I'd rather not.
20. 小叮噹 doesn't show on sat mornings.
1. There may be times when I would be expected to make serious decisions.
2. The names that ran through my mind, friends or family, may not always be available to help.
3. When I was lying alone on the small operating table and asked to sign the consent form for operation, it was the ah-I-am-really-an-adult feeling.
4. And then I began to think, the few minutes before the procedure, what a sucky feeling this could potentially be when I am old and alone. With no dad or mum and no kids.
5. Despite having my leg stitched twice, I never got to see what goes on.
6. When I pack, food is one of the priorities.
7. So is moisturiser.
8. When I settle down and gather my emotions, I think I can take care of myself.
9. I try to prepare myself mentally for the worst.
10. Hospitalisation insurance saved my life.
11. Hospital food makes me excited. Like airplane food. And it is not because I took steroids.
12. Hospital food is really nice and healthy. Loved the detox and the -500g after staying a night. Even when I took carbs. Some carbs.
13. Drawing of my blood doesn't scare me. Should check if I am eligible for blood donations in future.
14. My doctor works really long hours.
15. Hospitals are not conducive for sleeping. You keep falling asleep but people keep waking you up. Nurses and doctors talk at night (which is necessary and understandable), people take my temperature and blood pressure, neighbour feels uncomfortable and tosses and turns (imagine how 4 bedded 6 bedded 8 bedded wards will be!), machines suddenly beep, aircon is too cold etc. Before you know it, it's time for breakfast.
16. Breakfast was poached eggs. Read the straits times while I ate.
17. It's nice to receive a get well soon basket from colleagues.
18. It's nice to have caring and enthu nurses.
19. Having visitors would disturb other patients in the ward, so I'd rather not.
20. 小叮噹 doesn't show on sat mornings.
Friday, May 6, 2016
Late Night Mugging Thoughts
Revisiting previous to-do list:
1. Get a pair of melissa's
2. Take up a tuition assignment or 2
3. Learn coding
4. Learn a language
5. Do a 10k run
6. Volunteer
7. Donate monthly
8. Get some sort of an account which gives higher interest when salary is credited by giro
9. Get hospitalisation insurance
10. Jog twice a week
Found some sites to learn coding from so...we'll see how. 10k run will be coming up end of the month. I jog...once a week but but but I zumba okay but I know I should do twice sigh.
Am studying, sort of, for a presentation that I have to give tomorrow. It's kind of exciting and scary at the same time. I hope I don't embarrass myself and my organisation too much. There are some personal work goals that I should start to keep track of too. Like familiarising myself with some information, reaching out to new people every week etc. Instead of focusing on eating peanut butter waffles (DAMN NICE DAMN NICE DAMN NICEEEE $1.60 ONLYYYYYY) and chocolate lava bread (OMG BETTER THAN LAVA CAKE $1.60 TOOOOOOO) for tea breaks. Today we had an airfryer party for teabreak even. Preposterous.
3. Learn coding
4. Learn a language
5. Do a 10k run
6. Volunteer
7. Donate monthly
10. Jog twice a week
Found some sites to learn coding from so...we'll see how. 10k run will be coming up end of the month. I jog...once a week but but but I zumba okay but I know I should do twice sigh.
Am studying, sort of, for a presentation that I have to give tomorrow. It's kind of exciting and scary at the same time. I hope I don't embarrass myself and my organisation too much. There are some personal work goals that I should start to keep track of too. Like familiarising myself with some information, reaching out to new people every week etc. Instead of focusing on eating peanut butter waffles (DAMN NICE DAMN NICE DAMN NICEEEE $1.60 ONLYYYYYY) and chocolate lava bread (OMG BETTER THAN LAVA CAKE $1.60 TOOOOOOO) for tea breaks. Today we had an airfryer party for teabreak even. Preposterous.
Monday, April 11, 2016
Minutes of Meeting
To organise some things inside my head before I lose track.
1. To do not my best but what is expected and requested. To go with the flow. To learn to hold it in and not shoot my mouth. Opportunity awaits those who are prepared. Timing matters. If it is not meant to be then it is not.
Deadline: Mid-May
2. Not expect to be made a priority when I've made it an option. Undecided but uncertainty is unhealthy. We don't know how this works. We need to talk. I may need to initiate.
Deadline: End Apr
3. Calm down. I've had a long day, you may have had a bad day. Treat with respect. Do not interpret intentions negatively. Exercise patience. Lotsssss of it.
Deadline: On-going
4. Persevere. Set a schedule. Follow through. It affects a couple of things. Don't forget that you are supposed to be determined.
Deadline: End May
With that, hopefully a fresh start to workday Monday.
1. To do not my best but what is expected and requested. To go with the flow. To learn to hold it in and not shoot my mouth. Opportunity awaits those who are prepared. Timing matters. If it is not meant to be then it is not.
Deadline: Mid-May
2. Not expect to be made a priority when I've made it an option. Undecided but uncertainty is unhealthy. We don't know how this works. We need to talk. I may need to initiate.
Deadline: End Apr
3. Calm down. I've had a long day, you may have had a bad day. Treat with respect. Do not interpret intentions negatively. Exercise patience. Lotsssss of it.
Deadline: On-going
4. Persevere. Set a schedule. Follow through. It affects a couple of things. Don't forget that you are supposed to be determined.
Deadline: End May
With that, hopefully a fresh start to workday Monday.
Thursday, March 24, 2016
I think you think
Sometimes I look at all these rather successful people and think to myself
How does it feel to be so busy?
Do you tell lame jokes and laugh genuinely?
Do you have alone time/family time/fasting from email time?
How do you remember so many things without a notebook and pen?
Do you sleep 8 hours a day?
Then again maybe they are looking at nobodys like me and wondering how I can allow myself to be so free.
Sunday, February 28, 2016
To Do
1. Get a pair of melissa's
2. Take up a tuition assignment or 2
3. Learn coding
4. Learn a language
5. Do a 10k run
6. Volunteer
7. Donate monthly
8. Get some sort of an account which gives higher interest when salary is credited by giro
9. Get hospitalisation insurance
10. Jog twice a week
Leap year means one more day of work this year.
2. Take up a tuition assignment or 2
3. Learn coding
4. Learn a language
5. Do a 10k run
6. Volunteer
7. Donate monthly
8. Get some sort of an account which gives higher interest when salary is credited by giro
9. Get hospitalisation insurance
10. Jog twice a week
Leap year means one more day of work this year.
Monday, February 15, 2016
Fresh Beginnings
9am. 9.50am. New email. Google calendar. Dropbox. Smile. Look friendly. Lunch. Walk around. Meeting. Briefing. Slide deck. Dropbox. Dropbox. Mentors. Entrepreneurs. Bookings. Presentations. Dropbox. Invitation. Dropbox. Dropbox. Dropbox. Drop dead.
Thursday, February 4, 2016
最近
Been feeling super tired because I have been sleeping late. Been sleeping late because I don't feel fulfilled enough to sleep. And when I wake up I feel an immense amount of dread. Good news is it is 5 more days. Bad news is it is still 5 more days.
Sunday, January 31, 2016
5 things
Happy things:
1. Bonus
2. A promised nice meal
3. Finishing something overdued on checklist
4. No energy-draining kids
5. 7 more days only
Not so happy things:
1. No letter
2. No letter
3. No letter
4. No letter
5. Still 7 more days
1. Bonus
2. A promised nice meal
3. Finishing something overdued on checklist
4. No energy-draining kids
5. 7 more days only
Not so happy things:
1. No letter
2. No letter
3. No letter
4. No letter
5. Still 7 more days
Saturday, January 23, 2016
Thin ice.
Rid myself of toxicity.
Something I should have done long ago.
But have been too afraid to.
Maybe it's time.
Because life is too short to be constantly threading on thin ice.
Especially when I am not very thin.
一直觉得大事化小，不要计较
不介意用热脸去贴冷屁股
渐渐发现原来people不care
人生太短 我已不想蹉跎光阴
Something I should have done long ago.
But have been too afraid to.
Maybe it's time.
Because life is too short to be constantly threading on thin ice.
Especially when I am not very thin.
一直觉得大事化小，不要计较
不介意用热脸去贴冷屁股
渐渐发现原来people不care
人生太短 我已不想蹉跎光阴
Wednesday, January 6, 2016
Poke chicken.
Very poke chicken.
I don't wanna jinx it but it is really very poke chicken.
刺激，you know.
Adrenaline is pumping through my veins I cannot sleep.
人的忍耐真的是有限的。
老娘真的需要肯-trol. Heehee.
I don't wanna jinx it but it is really very poke chicken.
刺激，you know.
Adrenaline is pumping through my veins I cannot sleep.
人的忍耐真的是有限的。
老娘真的需要肯-trol. Heehee.
Saturday, January 2, 2016
One of those 2015 reflection posts thing
Was trying to do a bit of reflection on the year. It's like one's report card end of the year. And the beauty of a report card lies in that no matter how badly you did, your teacher will always find something nice to write about you.
I was looking at my blog to help guide the nice things I am about to write about myself. I haven't posted records of many events so it wasn't very helpful. The year seemed to have passed in a woozy manner, like I was drunk and sort of but don't really know what happened.
Worked for a second year. Learnt, experienced and realised. Patterns start to emerge after you do something for a longer time so it makes things clearer. Next step would be to take action but stay calm.
Lost some kgs in 2015 too though I fear gaining them back. Being a woman is stressful on so many levels but I will learn to conform to my gender stereotype haha. More importantly I realised that I am more determined than I thought I was. I knew I have always been a pretty stubborn person but fortunately perseverance is a more positive translation of that trait.
Went on several small trips, in fact more than I realised. Bali, Penang, Batam, Hong Kong, Bangkok. And interspersed random JB trips, one of which was done alone and impromptu. Thankful that I got to travel, and more thankful that I survived the accident. Am also very grateful for concerned friends and a good break from work. I don't have many friends and I don't think I express my appreciation frequently enough but I really really really am thankful to have known you all, for the big/little things you have done for me, for the kind words you say to me, for the time you are willing to spend with me. ♡
Mahjong-ed a lot more thanks to new people I got to know. Witnessing the pregnancy to the eventual birth of their child as well as attending another friend's wedding were small touching moments of the year. It reminded me that "yeah, this is really life" as we each reach big/little/mini milestones in our lives.
So there, that is all I can remember. 大家加油 for 2016!
I was looking at my blog to help guide the nice things I am about to write about myself. I haven't posted records of many events so it wasn't very helpful. The year seemed to have passed in a woozy manner, like I was drunk and sort of but don't really know what happened.
Worked for a second year. Learnt, experienced and realised. Patterns start to emerge after you do something for a longer time so it makes things clearer. Next step would be to take action but stay calm.
Lost some kgs in 2015 too though I fear gaining them back. Being a woman is stressful on so many levels but I will learn to conform to my gender stereotype haha. More importantly I realised that I am more determined than I thought I was. I knew I have always been a pretty stubborn person but fortunately perseverance is a more positive translation of that trait.
Went on several small trips, in fact more than I realised. Bali, Penang, Batam, Hong Kong, Bangkok. And interspersed random JB trips, one of which was done alone and impromptu. Thankful that I got to travel, and more thankful that I survived the accident. Am also very grateful for concerned friends and a good break from work. I don't have many friends and I don't think I express my appreciation frequently enough but I really really really am thankful to have known you all, for the big/little things you have done for me, for the kind words you say to me, for the time you are willing to spend with me. ♡
Mahjong-ed a lot more thanks to new people I got to know. Witnessing the pregnancy to the eventual birth of their child as well as attending another friend's wedding were small touching moments of the year. It reminded me that "yeah, this is really life" as we each reach big/little/mini milestones in our lives.
So there, that is all I can remember. 大家加油 for 2016!
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