Feeling thankful.

Appreciate it when people take time off and think of you and they show it through their actions, no matter how small. I love getting cards and handwritten notes. Always puts a smile on my face. 

The year has been good. Every year is a good year, because there is so much we learn and grow. For the new year, I should surround myself with more positive things. Positive people, positive activities, positive news. Because life is too short to be wasting time on things which do not value-add to your life. And I should learn to be more confident of my abilities and my strengths. Because there are people who do appreciate me for who I am, and I ought to be proud of it. 

Feeling thankful for a lot of things. :') Bring it on, 2014 (and the 22 more days of Dec)!

My favouritest boys.

Thankful for all the encouragement/support/words/fun/laughter this whole time. It makes me happy to see us all smiling. Though I must add that you all look more adorable when you are not fighting/poking/slapping each other.

修身齐家治国平天下

Hopefully, with things being more in place by the end of the month, I can be more focused in life. Be it finding fulfillment in my soon-to-be job-and-potential-career, or getting into a sort of a routine of trying to lead a more active lifestyle. As they say, "修身、齐家、治国、平天下", although I don't really have to try to change the world or 平天下, I guess at least I could try to 修身 first.

Garden thoughts

Walk from the small wooden cottage along the concrete path into a garden. On both sides of the concrete path are flowers -- blue, red, yellow, pink, white. Take a deep breath and smile. Continue walking till you reach the end of the long path. There is a white swinging chair for two and it rocks slightly as the balmy breeze blows. 

So peaceful, so calming.

Not just for 愛情

想靠愛情改變對方 ? 

有志氣, 但大概行不通。
愛情最強時 也許能改變對方某些行為, 但改變不了那個人。

如果你堅信「只要我們在一起, 對方一定會改變」, 恐怕會失望。

人都會改變, 但很難照你的意思改變,
到最後會改變的, 大概是你對這件事的態度 : 
你會終於了解 這沒什麼可勉強的, 然後聳聳肩, 
饒了對方, 也饒了你自己。

~~【 愛的輕句子 by 康永 】

Wise words.

看开一点

I just realised that today is a special day to be listening to this song. I guess growing up/ageing/maturation is a lot more complex than I thought. Some things we used to hold dearly are challenged time and again. Values and opinions are being questioned by people, by yourself. Yet the speed of recovery improves after each huge disappointment. Not that we get less disappointed, but we are equipped with more weapons to fight the negativity. After all, time spent brooding over matters which are less-deserving of your attention means less time for matters which are more important, matters which concern yourself.

Let's all try to be like a fish. Or a pigeon. Grow eyes at the sides of our heads and 看开一点.

For an archive for July

Either I am lazy to update here, or I prefer writing a diary these days.

...寧願在發聲機器面前笑著忙

Heard the Mandarin version over the radio a few weeks ago. Really loved the lyrics but it's so hard to find a Mandarin version so we shall make do with the Canto one. The content's about the same anyway. And nope it's not directed at anyone in particular. Love 林夕！

And did you know 林夕spells 梦? :D

(Nearing) End of Examssssss.

Am still outside now, attempting to study for my last paper. I'm so restless that I'm going crazy. I can't stand it. I get distracted every 0.02314 seconds and I don't know why. It is extremely annoying and frustrating.

Usually when something bothers me, I sleep it away. When it can't be slept away, I conclude that it is a real problem. I don't know how to continue from here already. It just piles and piles. Perhaps I am a troublesome friend to have but it's fine. Funny thing is, I never recalled myself being like that when I was in that situation. Or maybe I was, just that I never realised it I guess. I'll take note in future if I get a chance to.

And perhaps it's just PMS. That's what I like to tell myself. And recently I like to tell myself that only I matter. Is it making me happier? Maybe not. But if I don't tell myself that I am afraid I would lose more hope in people. It's so so tiring. I think I need to hide in a cave.

Nevertheless, as my exams come to an end, there are different people whom I want to specifically thank for making this last exam much more bearable. Thank you for checking on me and giving words of encouragement. Thank you for being there and cheering me up together with your friend after the sucky interview, though you probably didn't realise it meant a lot to me. Thank you for inviting me to your house and the meal you cooked, plus the calming words when I needed them. Thank your partner for the smses which your partner was probably made to send me because they make me happy as well. Thank you for being my dinner and study buddy and I really appreciate your company this sem. Thank you all for organizing gatherings which allows me to take a break from life and have fun. I am really appreciative of all that you all have done despite being busy with other things yourselves.

Let's go, there is only one paper left. Even if I have to do it myself, it's okay. Because only I matter.

The Women.

"Because once you ask yourself the question, 'What about me?'...everything changes for the better."

- The Women

My favourite quote from that movie. Had been trying to find it for some time and I finally came across it HERE. I just happened to catch that movie cuz it was on Channel 5 some time ago, and later found out that the cool thing about the movie was its absence of male characters. Times have changed, tzy. *smirks*

Tea.

Am supposed to finish up an assignment due tomorrow but I think I need a break plus I need an archive for April so I'm here. I just realized how busy I would be from now till end of exams cuz I have a test this Fri on the whole sem's materials which I have not been reading and then an optional draft for a paper for one of the mods which I doubt I can submit in time and then an exam on the first possible date of all exams and everything is soclosetogetherthatIcannotaffordtoevenpressmyspacebar.

Breathes in and out.

On an unrelated note, it's nice how we no longer have to restrict ourselves to earl grey milk tea. The variability is great. Of course, once in a while we still go back to earl grey but it's nice to be surprised by the new perspectives jasmine green tea can give you. Or how honey red tea can make you feel refreshed. And when you finally go back to earl grey milk tea, you would be reminded about what was once so nice about it and be more appreciative of the comfort it can give you.

The caterpillar told the butterfly...

...you've changed.

Okay I remember retweeting that a long time ago.

Was walking home that day and then I started thinking about how I've changed over the years. I never used to like cereal prawns (never once touched them when we had them at those dinners celebrating a certain god's birthday or hungry ghost festivals) but I look forward to eating them at tzi char stalls now. And just yesterday, I ordered a can of green tea to my own amusement. Plus instead of ordering the usual mocha- flavoured ice-cream, I tried the lavender milk tea flavour. I like Pepero less nowadays, and I am less crazy over muah chee. Strawberry Pocky and Hello Panda doesn't excite me anymore. I tried caramel biscuit and I quite like it. Recently I drank pumpkin soup from Soup Spoon and ate pumpkin rice from Lao Huo Tang and I liked them too.

Food aside, I have been trying to go to the gym twice a week and play badminton once a week. I even attend weekly Bollywood dance classes (whereby I am the most youthful member there but that's besides the point). On days when I end late or leave late, I walk out from Utown alone instead of taking the shuttle bus (sometimes as far as to the MRT) and I quite like that too. I like how I can feel the cool breeze at night and how I can listen to songs and sing my lungs out while constantly checking if anyone's near enough to hear. I never used to like travelling when I was younger (How can it be right, I know) but now I understand why people like it and the possibility of going abroad excites me to no end (screams TAIWAAAAAAAAAN).

Times change, people change. You will change and so will I. I had always subconsciously associated change with the bad (who doesn't like constancy and predictability?) but I quite like this change now.

"We told each other we should get coffee sometime, but didn’t exchange our new numbers. We knew we weren’t going to see each other again."

I like this quote from Thought Catalogue.

你存在 我嬸嬸的腦海裡

I find myself hooked every time this song plays. I really like the tune and the way she sings it. Sounds so effortlessly yet it gives me goosebumps.



And apparently someone sang it on some China talent search programme. A big man. So the stark contrast attracted some attention I guess. But both versions are nice.

Caricature!

本宫乏了。不再理了。

甄嬛传

I'm recently hooked onto this Chinese drama which is supposedly very popular in Taiwan (they showed it three times), called 甄嬛传. And I find myself looking at the females in my class and wondering who looks like the emperor's concubine, or a maid, or an evil concubine etc. Lame, I know. But at least it makes for a fun daydream experience.

Assignments and presentations are starting to come in and so I'm supposedly busier. This sem seems slacker in terms of workload but because I am so unmotivated to work hard, it sucks. Sometimes I tire myself out when there's no need to. Like watching 甄嬛传 till wee hours of the night.

That day I was having a convo with a friend, who said he read in a book that everyone should have a real fight once in their lives. Like physically fight another person. Cuz we should experience the feeling of losing all  rationality once in our lives. But I guess as we grow older, it's harder to lose that rationality. The stakes are too high. Then again, who is to say we cannot fight. We can still fight in our own ways. Our own sneaky backstabs, stirring trouble, spreading rumours, putting thoughts in the minds of others. I guess the impact will be greater than a physical fight. Such fights are very draining. Yet we find ourselves unable to stop once we pit ourselves against each other. Till we engulf ourselves. And die.

Must be too much 甄嬛传.

最浪漫的事

Happy Valentine's Day! Song dedication to all of you!

最浪漫的事



And in case you bother to listen to the old school version. Personally think this is much more meaningful. Heard it on a tv show once where the original singer sang it and I immediately added the song to my youtube playlist.



作詞：姚若龍
作曲：李正帆

背靠著背坐在地毯上　聽聽音樂聊聊願望
你希望我越來越溫柔　我希望你放我在心上
你說想送我個浪漫的夢想　謝謝我帶你找到天堂
哪怕用一輩子才能完成　只要我講你就記住不忘

我能想到最浪漫的事　就是和你一起慢慢變老
一路上收藏點點滴滴的歡笑　留到以後坐著搖椅慢慢聊
我能想到最浪漫的事　就是和你一起慢慢變老
直到我們老得哪兒也去不了　你還依然把我當成手心裡的寶

Taylor Swift tonight yo. To complete paper tonight (hopefully). Wanted to get something nice for the people I'm meeting tomorrow but I forgot to buy them. : /  Hopefully I remember to get them tomorrow haha.

Wishing everyone 幸福! <3

幸福!

Happy Chinese New Year. Although I have a paper to write (due on chu wu) and a quiz to study for (yes quiz on chu si what the huat right), I still hope good things happen to my professors. Wishing everyone lots of happiness and joy in the new year, and be 幸福!

Feb Fun

Greetings, loyal followers.

Because I haven't switched on my laptop for a thousand years, I haven't been blogging.

School has started and as a graduating year 4 student, I have been very busy with JB trips (twice already and I don't know for what!), dinners with different groups of people, birthday celebrations (Happy Birthday OFF!), weekly badminton sessions, less frequent but still a couple of gyming trips and doing...some...readings. So life has been great! The only mildly disappointing part of it is that I didn't get to sign up for Zumba class by NUS Aerobics Club. Super cheap, $40 only, but the response was so overwhelming that there were no more places for us by the time we reached. Depressing. :(

Had reunion dinner with mum's side and it was a great gathering. Aunts from Malaysia came with Grandpa and they brought awesome handmade chilli and duck. Grandma cooked curry chicken too. The last time she cooked it was n years ago. And cousins grow taller again. Too bad we didn't get a photograph together but it was a heartwarming night, at least for me.

Oh oh, I'm trying not to use fb or twitter for as long as possible so don't try to communicate with me on those platforms. I guess I've had enough of refreshing my news feed and twitter feed. I'm still on instagram but it's okay because I don't think I'll post anything since I hardly post things anyway. I've downloaded the Channel Newsasia app to replace twitter hahaha since I follow the straits times there.

Happy Chinese New Year everybody! Okay, time to get ready and go to school! :D

Resolutions.

I forgot if I made resolutions for myself last year, but I remember the year before I made some sort of resolution about being more open to make new friends and getting out of my comfort zone to go for CIP or summer school. And somehow I think I accomplished all 3. So I think it's nice to make new resolutions in the middle of Jan (Oh Jan how did you zoom past me without me knowing).

1. Do what I want to do. Which is making myself fulfill my unfulfilled dreams. Such as visiting the live turtle and tortoise museum. Or watching whatever movie I want to watch. Especially get ear piercings and try on contacts. Which I've been trying to get myself to do for the past few years. When I was 21 I wanted to give myself a birthday present by piercing my ears. But I didn't have the guts. And when I was 22 I wanted to do it. But I didn't have the guts again. So I shall make it happen this year. If not 3 strikes and you are out.

2. Start exercising regularly. Meaning doing my secret OJs. And participating in whatever fun and interesting exercise regime the Wuhan people might come up with. So that I can make you men regret for not wooing me. HAHAHA. No lah not as if I'm training to be an athlete. Just that I really wanna be a little bit more active for the fun of it.

3. Go for a good grad trip. Which means I got to start saving up for it now. Whee. Can't wait. Okay this doesn't really sound like a resolution hor. More of like a plan that I should carry out.

It's the last sem already and like the previous sem, I don't feel particularly motivated. Then again, there's never a sem whereby I feel super motivated. Just wanna stand here and let you watch me burn. Okay I should go sell textbooks make myself feel happy!

Monsterrrrrrrr.

I am a big girl so I should deal with this on my own!

Goodnight!

Byebye 2012

I'm glad 2012 ended better than it would have if I had just stayed in my comfort zone and ate slept K-ed watched movies met friends watched youtube for an entire month. I can't believe it has only been 3 weeks. Sure, the feeling is different from HK, and I really got sick and tired nearing the end of it all so I was kind of glad it ended. I didn't realised how much I had actually enjoyed myself during this time, how much fun I actually had, how much I had learnt about and learnt from these people. The trip did help me get things off my mind. I cannot thank them enough for coming into my life and ending off 2012 with an unexpected bang. Thank you thank you thank you. (:

And for all of you who have been with me for 2012, you know who you are. Especially you who have been with me for so long. Thank you too. Please continue to be by my side in 2013. As my Brownie song goes, "Make new friends, but keep the old. One is silver, the other is gold." For those who have come and gone, I wish you all the best and I'm glad our paths once crossed.

I threw away my 2012 scheduler. I had the habit of keeping them for don't know what reasons. But as a wise tzy once said, "If you cannot let go of the past, how can you embrace the future?" or something along those lines (I was sure he used the word 'hug' but 'embrace' made it sound so much more...atas.) I can't wait to throw more things away during spring cleaning, which unfortunately for me has already started yesterday (thanks to #enthumum).

And inspired by the student volunteers we met in China, I have decided to sign up for Airport Meet-and-Greet with i.CARE again. And hopefully participate in some of their activities. Since it's the last chance for me to help out too. Can't wait for the sem to start again! All the best for the new year!