Slow down

Does anyone still read these things these days?

Here cuz it is 1.22am on a workday and my body seems to be adjusting to France timing in advance thanks to a latte at 8pm. Think I am getting more and more sensitive to caffeine.

(And maybe also more sensitive cuz pms)

This thing called life is a little scarier than I imagined. I don't think anyone of us grew up thinking we'll be so auntie/uncle but it just sucks you in slowly. We get grumpier day by day, more anxious than before, and following a routine/structure having lived life a certain way for x years. I used to tell myself as a kid that when I earn enough money I'll buy lots of karma tissue and donate to the blind one man band, but as I grew I found myself increasingly matching the pace of the footsteps around me and forgetting to notice them despite being financially able to fulfill that promise. As we get more connected to the world, we are seemingly more detached from our immediate community.

Yet I cannot stop this slow but definte transformation. I wonder if our parents/grandparents ever felt this way. Maybe life was easier when all you had to do was to fulfill your daily operational role (cook, clean, attend to childeen) instead of looking at big projects (renovation, holiday, house, car etc).